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“We fantasize that we can say anything we want to our kids, but the truth is, we never could,” she argues.And, as both we and our kids age, our blurt-it-out tendencies seem to grow worse.This list is meant to help you avoid uttering those unintentionally hurtful things I've heard parents say over the years, and to offer some less offensive alternatives.Maybe wait it out a month or two before lambasting the b_____. So here it is, another opportunity to have a meaningful discussion that will nudge our fledglings onto the road to responsible adulthood. And One Day the Tables Will Turn Researchers, including Kira Birditt, Ph.D., of the University of Michigan Institute for Social Research, report that tensions between parents and their grown offspring may be more upsetting to the parents than to the children. As I’ve said to my kids, “There’s no way you’re going to understand how I feel until you have kids of your own.” Of course, that’s probably not the right thing to say.I know perfectly well that young adults hate it when their parents pressure them about marriage, so my only self-defense is that my mouth was working more quickly than my mind.I really do expect that when my son and his girlfriend have news that involves a wedding, my husband and I will be among the first 100 people to know.Parents often say ridiculous and sometimes hurtful things.We forget that we’re speaking to mature people (not that they always make it easy to remember).We condescend when maybe we should remember that what seems innocent or even playful to us is nails on a blackboard to them.There are just certain things that parents should never say to their grown children.